| | It's been too long, and I've had nothing to say and everything to live for.
I walk in six days, the ending of four years and the beginning of something new.
What comes next?
Some days, I believe in love. Some days, I speak heresy to myself. Days like today are gorgeous, blue and cloud-tossed skies, whispers of white streaming over the azure and brilliant spring green, but my heart is shadowed. It's too early. It's too meaningless. If I could articulate what I needed would that even help gain me what I long for? There are words yet unspoken, which every night I wish I could let tumble from my lips like the touches spring so willingly from my fingertips...as if that pinpoint touch of skin to skin could convey everything welling up inside.
And yet, days like today ring hollow.
If we are all dreams, I am afraid of awakening. Or if we are all ghosts, I am afraid of the fading. It's funny, to fear both the becoming real and the decline into the unreal.
All I need really...I could reassure myself in your eyes. Distant. Shadowed, heavy flicker, dilated, tinged red. Near, subdued sparkle, moonstone glow, a smile that travels and shines. I don't know. I don't know. Sometimes I need to not know and just be held, but still I'll lie alone.
I'll be here, there, walking the world alone. Seven months and we'll see what brings me home. |
| | Posted 5/25/2009 10:36 AM - 17 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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